Finally, i am in..!!!!! After almost an hour of typing, retyping and again retyping of password, verification code, email id, and the brain teasing task of deciding upon the blog name, and then checking its availability, i am finally in to the world of blogging, when the clock struck 12 midnight... The herculean task did not only exhaust me of my sudden enthusiasm to become a blogger , but also drained me of the many ideas i had thought of for a kick start.. so here i am, scribbling all the random thoughts popping up inside my drowsy head (do buy that, if u find that this piece doesn't interest you!!!!!!!)

Sorry.. I am no longer scribbling. After the first para, i find myself stammering for words.. The only bulb that lit up was about answering the numerous "why " questions. "why pandora??", " why blog", "why now??"etc.( etc. is exactly the word to be used when you can't list anymore..!!!).. But then it would be in exact line with the first post of the blog of a friend's friend of mine, which inspired me to blog ( well, that explains a why question partially..!! ) , and more importantly, i have only vague answers for all of them.. I know nothing more than just that i am trying to focus a few shattered thoughts of mine..

Alright, so let me start off with an incident that happened a few days back. It isn't much of an incident, but still it left me embarrassed and lost in thoughts. I was on the way to college from lh, when I spotted a vendor selling posters and wall papers. A few girls had circled around him, choosing between posters for the ones to beam at them from walls and doors. I too joined the gang, though not sure whether to buy one or not. There were literally hundreds of posters. Many that tried to capture the beauty of nature in two dimensions, many with quotes from anonymous, on hope, or happiness or dreams or about the importance of saving time,or what not. Many with fluffy kittens and puppies, and still many more with with those cute, chubby American babies. For free, they were fine. But I found none impressive enough for being bought for ten or twenty bucks in my wallet. ( Yes, you are right..!! I am a Shylock!!)

It was then that one poster caught my eyes and i squeaked in excitement, "wow, isn't that cute..!!!?? ". It was a painting ( may be a reprint version of some renowned work, but I don't know) of two lovers sitting on a swing. The girl was embracing the boy with so much of joy. She looked like the most blessed in the world.Care and affection was overflowing from his eyes, which I felt surrounded her as a halo. She had wrapped herself in a pure white cloth, as pure as their love. Divine love filled the air, divine love was radiating from their faces and it reached out to my heart. They were lost in a world, that was entirely their's!!

Startled by my squeak, a few girls turned to look at me and my dear poster. Eyes twinkling with joy, I looked at them to share the admiration for the painting. But shocked was I, to see the cold faces, some even trying to mask the disbelief for my heinous act. Now, what was wrong? In utter disappointment, I looked back at my painting. The white clothing was only partially hiding her nudity. Was that the trouble? I saw the posters of those fat American kids that these girls had selected.

Oh NO..!! Please don't mistake me for a nymphomaniac..!! Totally embarrassed, I murmured that I was getting late for my class and left the place.

Is it that I am too romantic?? And that they are the least?? Or, that they are too motherly , and I am the least..? Oh, will I never make a good mother to my kids? But then, I did always want to kiss and play with the naughty boy in the "Horlicks" ad. Why couldn't I appreciate the innocence in eyes of those American kids, just like those girls. Was I being indecent in exclaiming about a painting like that?

I don't know. May be the painting pictured the most cherished dream of mine, to lose myself in the caring hands of my love, that I felt such a strong inclination for it.

The vendor was gone the next day, and I couldn't buy my poster.I had planned in vain of getting it secretly,when no one was around. I still find myself yearning for that painting.

OK. So thats my first post. Whoever reads this, please leave your suggestions.. :)